THIS Thursday is Thanksgiving Day in America.
My wife, Tasha, and I have, since we moved to the UK in 2018, always planned to be in the US for Thanksgiving, and to return to Largs for Advent and Christmas and Hogmanay.
We have found that we can tolerate missing Christmas with our family and friends in the US more than we can tolerate missing Thanksgiving.
Now, you might ask, “But isn’t Thanksgiving just a day when Americans get together and eat a big meal?” And my answer to that would be, “yes, it is that.” But it isn’t JUST that.
In our family, as in others, Thanksgiving is a day when many folks travel long distances to gather at the home of the pater (and mater) familias.
In the current season of our family history, that’s Tasha’s Dad (and Mum). When everyone’s there, the house will be filled with several dozen relatives - brothers, sisters, aunts and uncles, mums and dads and of course, lots of cousins.
But not everyone will be family in the strictest sense. There will be a good representation of friends old and new - maybe a boyfriend or girlfriend or two. There will be brand new acquaintances, strangers to some - but they won’t be for long.
By the end of the meal an objective observer would be hard-pressed to identify who’s related by blood or marriage and who isn’t. That’s because sharing the feast that we’ve all had a part in preparing, and sharing a table with others, creates a familial bond between individuals.
So does praying together, and playing games together, and singing together, and listening to the piano together as we watch toddlers dance to the tunes their great-grandmother plays -and maybe some older folks join in, too. And of course, the food is really good as well.
I read an article recently, by Dr Robin Dunbar, that demonstrated how all those things that happen on Thanksgiving Day strengthen a person’s sense of belonging and have positive effects on our physical, spiritual, and mental health as well.
That’s why we look forward to and treasure spending Thanksgiving Day in South Carolina.
But it’s also why we look forward to returning to Largs for the community Christmas Day dinner - because eating together is good for us.
We are connected to, accepted by, and unified with those with whom we eat- we become a family.
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